February 9th 2017 – “Why do I attract adulterers!?”

I wake up positive today.
I have the day off and I get to see my cast mates for a fun evening of Jack The Ripper Tour/Pub Crawl! The only thing is, we’ve picked the one night it is -2 to be walking around outside stopping off at murder scenes! I’m taking a hip flask to warm me up. No joke.

I get up and get ready for the day. For the first time I start my new routine, I look over my goals that I wrote and stuck on my wall, I read them aloud. I then thank the universe for everything I have and that is coming to me. I pick a complement from my Complement Cookie Jar and read it aloud. “You deserve the best”. I repeat it, believe it, and smile while thinking about it.

I take this positive vibration and let it carry me to the gym.
Do my leg day, which in hindsight, when I’m about to do a lot of walking in the cold, is not the best idea. But I did it. And I feel good.

I walk into town and head to see my friends at work, sit and waste time before I leave to meet my cast. For some reason I walked from Oxford Circus to Algate. I thought it would only take 40mins. How wrong I was. 40mins in I decide to get on the tube… Head down and then they shut it because of congestion. Of course they do. So I just walk the rest and turn up late.

So happy to see everyone. We catch up and have a drink, then set off!
It was FREEZING!! My toes were about to fall off.
I can’t recommend the tour enough, our guide, our friend, was brilliant. So engaging, and interesting. I’m not usually one for tours and history, but I found it amazing. I didn’t realise there was only 5 victims. I thought it was more, for such a famous serial killer. And the way he killed them, which came with pictures, gruesome! And I say He, but it could have been a She!
We stopped off in a few pubs for drinks and for a much needed warm up.
It was lovely to see everyone feeling stronger. People asked what was happening and I explained the current situation of him being in Mexico, but I found I didn’t want to talk about it. I couldn’t be bothered. It drains my energy. And it’s not fun! Why should he be having fun and I’m stuck back at home going over and over things with people. I want to hear about them, my friends lives, and happiness, that will uplift me.

I found a new iPhone on the pavement during our tour. It was on 9% and luckily it didn’t have a lock on it, so I opened it and went straight to recent call list. It was some boys name with a ❤️❤️ next to it. A boyfriend then.
I call it. He answers. I explain I found the phone and it’s on low battery, gave him my number to arrange meeting up tomorrow to return it. He was extremely grateful, said it was his girlfriends new work phone. He said that he was also currently on air as a radio DJ and would give me a shout out on air to say thanks.
I hang up and rejoin the tour.
Next thing I know the phone starts to ring. It’s the girl. She’s borrowed a strangers phone to call it. I had no idea where we were so couldn’t explain, but luckily the next stop off was a pub. I told her the pub and to meet us there.
She turns up with the male stranger in toe I case she couldn’t find me. She was so grateful. Said her new job would have killed her for losing it. She wanted to buy us drinks to say thank you… She was already drunk. She got us each a drink and a shot of sambuca. Not really what I wanted but it would be rude not to. We make small talk but to be honest I want to go back to my mates, so I sort of slip away, feeling good about my deed.

I’m expecting my good karma any day now. Please. I need it.

I carry on chatting to my group, and one of them nods in the direction of the girl and the stranger… I turn… They are kissing eachother!!!! Why do I attract adulterers!? FFS. This is also around the same time her boyfriend texts me to say thank you and that he will send me positive vibes! I feel awful. Does mean my good karma won’t come!?

But it’s none of my business, I did my good deed. I’m shocked, but I just turn my back and carry on with my friends. In the words of Valerie cherish “I don’t want to see that!”.

I was up for a big night but it didn’t happen, but maybe I should be thankful for that. I should just leave it on a high, without getting too messy. I head home, and try not to think about the fact G will be back from holiday tomorrow, and what that might bring.

All I want is my good karma!


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